one might say we're banned from that church
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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