I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
