i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize