Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
