i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
