Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
