so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Randomize
