Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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