Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
