Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
