You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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