Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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