Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
