He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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