I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
