it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
