Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
