I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize