I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize