Do vagina's smell?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
My bed smells like the plague
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
