they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I'm both gender and math confused
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
