I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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