So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize