In the future we'll all be gay
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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