This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
