Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
