Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
