One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
