hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
