HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
