But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
