Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Randomize
