She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
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