my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
