IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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