my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
