Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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