A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
