i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
