R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
