So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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