please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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