Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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