physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
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