Can i not drive my cunt home
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
