Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
