he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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