Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
