peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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