We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
